The Murderer in Me.

"The Murderer in Me."

I wrote this line down in my notes during a long discussion with Ida (our leading lady) when the script was still in progress. I thought of using it in the context of the play.

I didn’t… and yet all I could think off yesterday, as I drove back from Eshowe to Richards Bay, was about the murderer in me.

Yes, there is a killer on the loose and it threatens to destroy me. It won’t be its first threat and it won’t be my last defeat.

One minute I think I’m still in control, the next minute it pounces on me out of the shadows, completely unexpected. There is a quick but brutal attack, very little defense and then the awkward, ruffled silence that follows…

It was only our 3rd rehearsal.

I am impatient; I have very high expectations. I threw a tantrum and left the rehearsal. I justified it and felt good about it - it needed to be done.

I completely forgot who I was working with and in which context…

The murderer in me killed again today.